Wednesday, August 4, 2010

My dog doesn't work.

I leave the mobile phone charging on a shelf in the kitchen where I keep pills and salt and stuff, and eggs which I like at room temperature, because its a convenient powerpoint and doesn't get in the way of much. Normally when it rings I think to disconnect it first, but I was in a rush just now when it rang, and forgot to unplug it so of course pulled everything down, including the box of eggs. The eggs hit the corner of the antique dresser - I'm house-sitting - but only one broke, so not too much damage; I'll get the dog to lick that up.
"Yoshi, come here! Come on little dog, another breakfast for you! " Yummy egg, what dog could resist?

This dog! she cautiously approach, had a sniff, looked at me slightly offended, and went back into the kitchen to sit on her haunches, saying "I thought there was some food for me."
The egg dropped and broken into the wheel-foot coaster started to soak into the carpet, the deep-pile cream-coloured carpet.

"Come on! It's egg. Yum. Here, I'll show you..." Nope, not interested.

In lots of ways having a nervous minature is slightly annoying but quirky, like when she needs to climb on my shoulder to escape bigger dogs that scare her at the dog beach - like miniature foxies and those savage silky terriers. It's kinda cute. She has such delicate little feet and is so pretty. And most people aren't too scared when she comes racing out onto the street to bark like crazy with her hackles up.

But not eating eggs is really just taking the whole delicate thing a bit far.
This dog just doesn't work properly, and I'm wondering if she's still under warranty.

6 comments:

Spencer Collins said...

Great story, I really feel for you with the small dog thing, you should be able to download some upgrades...

chrissie said...

That'd be brilliant, SC!
Upgrades like
- lower-pitch barking
- reduced trembling
- greater independence version 3
- anxiety-free options 2 to 7
- daytime play, night-time sleep
- 'moving things aren't scary'
- won't chase small children

I'm also thinking of getting her tattoo'd with:
YES, SHE LOOKS TERRIFIED BECAUSE I ABUSED HER AS A PUPPY
or maybe
SHE SHAKES LIKE THAT BECAUSE SHE FEARS PAIN.

sarah toa said...

Sounds like the story coulda been called 'The Princess and the Egg'.

chrissie said...

Mind you, the "sleep happily in the car all day" function seems to be working pretty well.

Spencer Collins said...

The last few months I've been running SleepInBed 6.01 and BarkAtTrucks 2.1.3 with some success, I really love her user interface! There has been a bit of a problem with some malicious software though, BringBonesInside, but I think I have uninstalled it.

chrissie said...

One of my favourites is AppoplecticBarkingAtCats, especially when it works with Chasing^6, a quick-respose function; that probably says more about me than Yoshi. I've had a lot of success with Cute0.6 4, 7 and 8.3 which includes FrontPawsPullingSelfAlongOnBelly and looks alot like InsanePleasure, but I had a nasty encounter with malwear I thought I'd uninstalled, CrossRoadUnexpectedly, on Friday which almost caused complete system shutdown; it has a simple leash-response I can use to prevent it, but the prompts seem to get overridden by WarmSunnyMorning and RunningMadlyHome which came with Cute3.1.